Apologies

Hey everyone,

I apologize for not blogging in the last two weeks. It definitely feels strange and this may be the longest I have gone without blogging since I began. But, I do have an excuse.

The past two weeks have been extremely stressful for me. I have been on full time work placement, doing assignments, fitting in actual shifts and awaiting the results of the biggest job interview ever. I am pretty sure I have discussed the process of applying for the job I applied for? Since I can not be bothered to look back through my blogs to check...let me just tell you again (maybe).

Half way through the year, pretty much all nursing students apply for a position in a new graduate program. This program allows you to safely go through the transition from being a student to being a registered nurse and actually having peoples lives in your hands. Scary stuff.
So I heard there were about 4000 people applying in my state this year...that is a lot.
You apply online and then you get an email inviting you to an interview for the hospital of your first preference. The hospital I chose apparently only has 8 positions this year. I still don't know if this is true but that was the rumour. This obviously horrified me and I lost all hope early on in true Sarah fashion.

So you go to a scary scary interview in a little room in a big hospital with three people on a scary scary panel. I had two nurses and a doctor. It was rather terrifying and did I mention scary? They ask you six questions then give you a score in order to compare you to other applicants.
Then the hospitals take all of the high scoring people who put them as their first preference until they fill all of their positions.
It takes about 5 weeks for them to contact references etc and during that time there we were stressing our little heads off on placement and doing assignments and trying to live our lives.

Then there comes a day where everyone gets an email informing them of their outcome. Unfortunately they don't send the emails all at once but progressively over the day, so some people wake up to a response and some people found out at night. Which is crap but I guess they have to do them one by one...This day was last Thursday. I woke up and it was sunny, it then got cloudy, then sunny again, then it hailed and was an altogether strange day, both weather wise and emotion wise. Everyone was on edge and it was a horrible experience. I had an assignment due the next day so I decided I should try and finish that before I checked my emails so that I wouldn't be sad and have no motivation to do the assignment. I failed at that...completely.

I got the job.

I am so grateful to have been given the job. Next year I will be helping save peoples lives. For real. And I am terrified. How on Earth did I get it? I find it unbelievable but I am very happy and I don't think it has sunk in properly.

Unfortunately after finding out I got the job I had been aiming for for three years, there was no one to celebrate with...my family were overseas and my boyfriend was away on a boys weekend. It was all very anti-climactic and I wish it could have gone a different way.

Now if that isn't enough, I feel very on edge now because although I have been given the position, I now have to pass every single thing that gets thrown at me or I will have to give that position to someone else. What if something I have already handed in wasn't good enough because I didn't quite realize what was at risk...imagine having to pass up the opportunity you have been working for because you were a lazy ass hole lol.

Sigh. So as you can see, I have a lot on my plate. Although it is all exciting and I am very lucky and should just be grateful to be where I am, I am scared out of my mind at the possibilities of the future.
No this isn't my usual qwerky blog. But it is too hard for me to focus all my efforts on humour today.
So here is a picture of a dog dressed as a Geisha.

Thanks for reading xx